Practically every actor has a movie they regretted making. Many try to repress the experience, while others will go out of their way to poke fun at it; it masks the feeling of vengeance you want on the people that forced the experience upon you.

But no other passion against such films was as strong was an epic production starring a now-legendary actor making his screen debut. the actor was Paul Newman, the film was Paul Newman and the Holy Grail…er…The Silver Chalice.

This 1954 diaster starred Newman as an artisan in the era of Christ; the title refers to the grail Newman creates for the Last Supper. For two-and-a-half hours Newman strutted along bizarrely constructed sets wearing a Greek “cocktail dress” (as the actor referred to his toga). Critics likened him to a poor man’s Marlon Brando. The New Yorker‘s John McCarten agreed that [Newman] delivers his lines with the emotional fervor of a Putnam Division conductor announcing local stops.”

Religious epics were all the rage back in the ’50s, but with every Ben-Hur or Ten Commandments, you had The Greatest Story Ever Told, and The Silver Chalice. While the film’s director went on to say that audiences were pleased with it, the film has gone on to be considered a camp classic, most likely a result of the great lengths Newman did to ensure that the public knew how much he hated it.

And you would probably hate being in a film with such weird art direction.

Get your mind out of the gutter!

Legend has it that when Newman found out that the movie was to be screened on a Los Angeles TV station, he put out a $1200 ad reading “Paul Newman apologizes every night this week.” It only got people interested in watching it.

Some other notable “failures”:

• Christopher Plummer, The Sound of Music, best known as The Sound of Mucus or S&M by said actor. Cue angry fans who will light their torches, wear Swiss Miss outfits, and raid his house
• Bill Cosby, Leonard Part 6. At his height, Cosby co-wrote and produced a sci-fi spoof for Columbia Pictures, then a subsidiary of Coca-Coca (!), and operated by an eccentric British producer who hired an untalented British crew to undertake it (said producer is said to be the one who also sabotaged Ishtar). These incidents led Cosby to urge people not to see the film on talk shows!

Do some things go better with Coke?

• Katherine Heigl, Knocked Up. Called it misogynistic, but that didn’t stop her from signing up for the “equally sexist” Ugly Truth a little while later!
• Sir Alec Guinness, Star Wars. Reportedly made a little boy cry when “Obi-Wan” told him never to watch Star Wars again.

You would cry too if it happened to you!

•  Woody Allen, Manhattan. He told the producers he’d make another movie for free if they destroyed all copies of that one. A very positive example of executives not listening to its filmmakers.
• Burt Reynolds, Boogie Nights. He subsequently fired his agent.

Then what are your feelings about “Stroker Ace”?